Vimeo Killed the Video Star by Emily Smart

I went down to the video shop yesterday, and had a real ‘fuck I’m old’ moment. And have now just discovered that this is a real thing – see https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/3hwisr/what_was_your_fuck_im_old_moment/ Anyway, video shop, videos. When was the last time you actually played a video tape? I found a video the other day: Toy Story 2 and just checked when it was released. It was 1999! So give or take a year or so to go from cinema ‘straight to video’ (you don’t hear that anymore) and that’s about 18 years ago. Flippin’… Read More

Thoughts on guilt by Trevor, Susan and Emily

Not guilty by Trevor I’m not sure why guilt was ever included in our wiring system. Apart from acting as a religious crowbar, it just doesn’t seem to have any use outside the law. For the rest of us, it’s a pretty useless part of the emotional locker. I formulated this theory as a child by discovering that you either got away with it or you didn’t; given the former, there’d be nothing to worry about and in the latter case, I was going to cop it anyway so why clog things… Read More

The Smart social barometer by Emily Smart

Step back in time I’ve been thinking a lot about my school days recently and, in particular, the two years I spent at sixth form college between the ages of 16-18. Having left my secondary school, which really was a mixed bag of youngsters, I then moved to a rather exclusive college which was full of ex-private school kids who had bags of money, attitude and posh accents. Strangely, I immediately felt at home there and thoroughly enjoyed making new friends and having fun. Oh, and writing the odd essay or two,… Read More

Self-publish and be damned! By Emily Smart

Women with clean houses do not have finished books According to the esteemed writer Ernest Hemingway, ‘The first draft of anything is shit.’ So, you’ll be pleased to know we (the three of us wot write our thoughts for the worldwide web to read) have produced a book which has been several (hundred) drafts in the making. Not content with sharing our (ahem) wisdom and witticisms every week, we thought we’d produce a book together. We actually wrote this ‘tome’ several years ago. The manuscript has subsequently been languishing on Angela’s hard… Read More

Bridget’s Love Eggs by Emily Smart

So: it was Bridget’s birthday do last Saturday night, and I was in something of a quandary when it came to buying her a present. Bridget is what one would call a lady. I met her through Posh Clare, which should already tell you everything you need to know about her. She is refined, well spoken (for a Kiwi) and can often be heard telling me ‘Emily, don’t be so vulgar.’ A beauteous creature: I don’t think I’ve ever seen her without her ‘face on’ and outrageously high and expensive shoes. Even… Read More